Am I living it right?

Friday: major shopping spree with money i dont have. ate panda express.

Saturday: laundry and..

1. Romeo and Juliet
2. Monster-in-law
3. The wedding date
4. How to lose a guy in 10 days
5. the wizard of oz
6. sister act

Honestly, what has my life come to? I was watching movies from 9:30am to 7:30pm. I'm so sick.

That night Lindsay, Brad, and I went to a local dive bar in point loma called the captains quarters. Darts, pool, brad talking with guys about football, guys wanting to come back with us, brad telling them that lindsay and i were gay. so hey, at least the guys didnt come home with us. went to bed abnormally late.

Sunday: Fall classic. Pretty effing boring to watch fall races. It was good to be near the crew people again whom i've always taken a liking for. Saw Stu for the first time since school ended. Fell in love with him again...he's such a nice guy. The best part of the whole crew experience today was Nick's legs. (Nick stop blushing.) There's something so hot about his legs in spandex shorts.

Came home, took a nap, went for a much needed long run with jenny. i hadnt seen her since thursday so it was good to catch up. we talked about our weekend and how we are living our life right now and how we're not too happy with it. We decided that something needs to fill the void that had once held our marathon training. That void has left a serious scar on our current lifestyle. (hope that sentence made sense) We are both emotionally unstable as of today (note: this may change tomorrow being we are bipolar).

After our run, I asked jenny what she was up to and she said she was going to church. and for some odd reason i wanted to go. let's have a quick recap of andi's religious life...oh wait that's right i never had one. I never went to church when i was little and when i've gone in the past few years it turns out to be a far more emotional experience than you could ever imagine. i enjoyed the service though so that's good.

The main point I got from the service and just from religion in general is to live for others and do good deeds to help everyone and put their needs before yours. I love this thought but it's so damn hard to live an san diego and actually live that life. People, and by people I mean the majority of people, DON'T live that life. People are cruel, selfish, and put themselves before others because that's how you're supposed to get "ahead" in life. So, in the words on John Mayer, "am i livin it right?" I don't know which side to choose because you end up getting screwed with either. I don't know what type of person I am right now....and that bothers me too.

This is andi's life in terms of the type of person I was/am:

Elementary school: Bad - I was a popular brat.
Middle school: Bad - Called a girl names and now she's a porn star.
High school: Good - I loved everyone and everyone loved me!
First two years of college: Good - Everyone has good intentions so we should give people the benefit of the doubt.
Last two years of college: Bad - Started to realize that people suck and don't always have good intentions.
Post college: Undecided - I pretty much ignored everyone after school ended because i didn't know how i felt about anyone including myself. thats why i was completely happy running all the time with jenny. god i hope her goodness rubbed off on me.

Wow I am rambling today. I got a lot of ish on my mind and i don't really know who the right person to tell it to is, so i'll just tell everyone and broadcast it over the internet. what could be better than that! anyway, i think i am just going to go to bed and hopefully i'll feel better in the morning. in the meantime, don't be mean people.